Advertising

is a real scumbag job

make people want things

seduce, manipulate


pry inside the subconscious, convince them that they really do need that new thing, it’s not the neglect of their relationships or their dreams that is making them miserable, it’s that they don’t have one of our patented Luminara Flameless Candles at their holiday function or as a part of their home decor today. But only if you buy in the next 12 minutes, because we have red timer ticking down on the checkout page which triggers your subconscious into scarcity mode, so that you TYPE YOUR CREDIT CARD INFORMATION INTO THE FIELD BELOW AND CLICK THE “PURCHASE NOW” BUTTON, SO THAT YOU CAN EXIST AS ANOTHER DATA POINT ON MY FUCKING EXCEL SHEET THAT I HAVE TO PREPARE EVERY MONDAY MORNING FOR THE REST OF MY POINTLESS LIFE!

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